Saturday, January 12, 2013

The day she walked

Every parent feels a huge sense of pride at each "first" that their child has.  The first time you hear them cry when they are first born, the first time they smile, the first time they laugh, the first time they eat solid foods, the first time they sleep through the night, the first time they walk.

I have to say though, each first Caroline has is a different feeling for me.  When I was pregnant with her, we were told she might not have any firsts so each one is especially significant.  When she was born, her future looked pretty rocky.  Her firsts that we were so proud of were the first time she made it through a successful surgery, the first time she was extubated, the first time she was able to breath without a cannula.

With a child like Caroline, we don't know if she is going to have all the same firsts that most babies have; sometimes we ask, "Will she ever?" instead of, "I wonder when she will . . .".

When the boys were growing up, I prayed for them to be extraordinary.  I prayed for them to be different than the other kids.  Think different, be different.

With Caroline, I still pray for her to be extraordinary, but I also pray for her to be normal.  I pray that she will get to have all the firsts that the boys were able to have.  And, everytime she does, I feel as though she can take on the world.

I came home on Monday night in a rush to get packed for a conference.  I asked Jesse if Caroline had PT that day and he said, "Yeah, she was able to get her to take a couple steps."

I'm sorry!!  What?!?!?

So, I stood Caroline in front of me, took about three steps backwards and she started walking toward me.  I backed up a little more, and she kept walking.

You know how you feel when we win an event in the Olympics that we were the underdogs for?  And when our National Anthem plays, there is this lump in your chest because you are so proud and you feel the tears coming?

No?  Just me?

That's the feeling I got for the first couple steps.  Once I could tell that she was really walking, that lump in my chest exploded!!!  I started bawling, snorting, screaming . . . you name it, I was doing it.

I have never felt such a strong, uncontrollable emotion.

This is one of about 100 videos that I have made since Monday.  Taking a video of her walking never gets old :)!!

She still doesn't prefer to walk but she will walk anytime you ask her to.  She is getting better about standing next to a piece of furniture and walking away from it too.  That was a huge success.

One more first in the books!  One proud momma!!